In the evenings, I find it hard to shut my mind down and get some sleep. I have always been pretty transparent about my previous struggles with alcohol, thankfully I have been sober for 6 years this October. That being said, I think every person struggles in some way and my biggest struggle has been my anxiety. I really believe that my drinking problem could be largely attributed to trying to cope with my anxiety and depression which was undiagnosed at the time.
Now, my life has taken on a completely different role and while the excitement of what is to come makes me extremely anxious, it also soothes my soul in some odd way. As a Mom, it makes me realize that I have so many other purposes in showing my children that working hard means we get to play hard! But sometimes, playing hard at your job is what you can really find the most joy in! And that, my friends, is why I can’t shut my brain off to shut my eyes. Weird, right?
Recently, I was afforded a huge opportunity to put our products in the largest hardware store in our area. I mean, this was a huge deal! IS...IS a huge deal. The night before, I couldn’t sleep. Wondering what would happen if they didn’t like the displays, wondering if it would sell, worrying about the little details and completely overthinking every single possible thing on the planet that I could.
Matthew 6:34 tells us not to worry. So, why do I?
“Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.”
Tonight, my son hit it home hard. He said, “I love my life so much that I wish the sun would always stay out.” He said this as we were telling him that we made the decision to take something away that he loves...the tv. My husband and I decided to take the television out of our living room and make it a real family room. Our oldest son loves the tv and to be honest, it’s become a little bit of a problem. We’ve been so busy that it’s been easy to say, “go watch tv for a while until I get done.” We acknowledged that it was an issue and when we told him how we were going to fix it, he almost seemed excited! Maybe he realized it was a problem too? He wasn’t worried about it. He just looked for the positives in what was happening and let that be his focus.
We could all learn so much from our children. We think that we are teaching them so much, and we are. But my gosh, look at how his beautiful mind just did exactly what I should be doing instead of worrying.
I know, I know. I’m all over the place. The bottom line is, less worry. I want to find the positives just like Osee does! I want to be able to place my focus on what is important and let my anxiety rest. I know I am not alone in this. That’s the beauty of blogging and sharing. When you’re somewhat disconnected from people, you can really connect through words.